There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
Randomize
