ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
I just realized I haven't looked at our horoscopes lately. If mine says anything about tweakers, I'm burning my phone.
Oh shit oh shit oh shit.
BURN THE PHONE.
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
Randomize
