It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
All the doctor said was why
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
Randomize
