Apparently you make a good broom.
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
That was before I lit my hair on fire
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
