Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Randomize