1:32a: I quit. signing up for eharmony. Don't judge
thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
Randomize
