you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Randomize
