This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
