all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Baby momma caught me doing baby daddy in reverse cowgirl. She kicked me out and i have no clothes, come get me.
I hope you walked the shit out of that shame.
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
Randomize
