Whoa Z and x make the same sound
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize
