I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
Did you pee in the oven last night??
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Randomize