he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
Randomize
