just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
Randomize
