just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
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