I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
Randomize
