I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
The Internet Is Obsessed With This Stripper Who Dropped It Low Just To Eat A Slice Of Pizza
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.