I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
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