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• (704): View more from North Carolina

  I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?

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• (925): View more from California

  dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning

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• (720): View more from Colorado

  It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants

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• (314): View more from Missouri

  i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.

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  If You’re Hot, It’s Easier For You To Do These 27 Things

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• (709): View more from Newfndlnd, Labradr

  ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.

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• (952): View more from Minnesota

  So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building

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• (914): View more from New York

  I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint

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• (330): View more from Ohio

  She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.

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• (410): View more from Maryland

  that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night

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  23 Struggles Kids These Days Will Never Know

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• (716): View more from New York

  We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.

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• (434): View more from Virginia

  He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.

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• (248): View more from Michigan

  It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.

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• (402): View more from Nebraska

  Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.

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• (585): View more from New York

  They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.

  (716): View more from New York

  So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?

  (585): View more from New York

  Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.

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• (506): View more from New Brunswick

  Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again

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