I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
Randomize