im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
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