I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
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