he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
Randomize
