She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
There was a time I was reining queen of Sunday funday... And at that same time I also weighed 20 pounds more, had the morale of a spearmint rhino stripper, and woke up most mornings asking more questions than fucking Barbara Walters. I think I just wrote my own epitaph.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
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