coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
I'm just crazy horny about you
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
Randomize
