I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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