what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
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