you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize
