i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
Randomize
