So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
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Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
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