he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
Randomize
