wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.