dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
Randomize
