My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
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