if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
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