I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
Randomize