That's intense
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
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