Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
