I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Randomize
