You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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