Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
Randomize
