"it" just moved
I think I am morally bankrupt
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
Randomize
