Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize
