Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
Randomize
