i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
And despite my lack of successful relationships I'm a fucking guru
That's like claiming you're a good coach but going 2-12 last season
Randomize
