That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
Randomize
