Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't put those talents on a resume
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Randomize