there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Randomize
