Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
Randomize
