Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
I could have mohawked her pubes.
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
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