I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
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