If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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